What is it like walking in the shoes of a mom who wants to do it all? Let me give you just a glimpse of it. I’m not complaining nor would I ever want to bypass this time but it is all a learning curb. You sit down to write a thought and the inspiration just seems to flow. You settle down in your computer space and start to type the words that seem to come naturally. But as you start to type your inspiration leaves you and you struggle to focus on what to write. You try to get it back but end up loosing sight of it. The words are lost.
You cry because you know that being a mom means everything to you but you just need a small break for you. You know as soon as you sit down your toddler will need you and your torn because you know you will miss these hard, long days where they need you. But the days are long and hard and they can drain you if your not careful to see the signs. The baby starts to cry or needs to be held, burped, or changed. You feel pulled this way and that and you just want to have a break.
All of this is an adjustment and I know it will become better through God and time. I’m learning so many new things about being a mom of 2, blogging and vlogging that it’s exciting but also frustrating. It’s frustrating because I want to do it all but I just can’t. I want to be the super mom and I will always put my kids first but I know I just can’t sit idle or else I’ll go insane!
My kids are my priority and that will always stay the same. There are moments when a mom needs to have a break and allow herself to not be touched, heard or needed but I’m just not getting enough time for that right now. My husband is great and allows for time here and there and I am very blessed with the man I’m with. I know this is a learning curb and I’m just being honest over here.
I know I’m only 2 months postpartum so I need to give myself grace. My mind is moving at a fast pace but my body just isn’t catching up. I have friends that help me and I’m grateful for their time but it’s just not the same as family. We are not able to move closer to home yet it’s something we are working on doing. I am not complaining or wanting to quit, I just need to find that right place to be a mom, write, vlog and work on other things. Maybe I just need to wake up early. Can anyone relate?
Help me be kind, patient, and understanding. I know what your will is for me. Help me to love others and give me the strength to go throughout this day. Thank you for the gifts and babies you have given me and don’t let me waste this precious time! Forgive me for any anger, or bitterness I have felt and help me to do better! Amen!