This week has been an interesting week to say the least…and I am super excited that 500+ of you wonderful people are here!! And I know y’all are waiting eagerly to see my transformation and it’s coming soon!!
I posted a video thinking it would be a positive things and it turned out to have mixed reviews…you can check it out for yourself on my Instagram page and if your not following me there I’d love it if you would join me there as I’m posting about body positivity, faith, motherhood, and and other stuff too. Anyway, the Lord has been reiterating that I need a heart attitude change. I am not humble nor and I having mercy on social media. I get bitter about social media actually because the way I look at social media is if I am standing right in front of you as if you weren’t behind a screen. So I found out 3 things about myself that I want to share.
First, I get hurt really easily when people are rude or think they know it all. A lot of this stems from childhood issues that I’m not going to get into now. I am fragile almost and get booty hurt over things easily…dear lord I pray my skin will become thick and my heart soft.
Second, I’m loosing my sense of Jesus. I so desperately want to be a light unto others on social media as well as in everyday life but I’m finding myself getting trapped in “success is through the worlds eyes” and my worth/identity is through how many likes and follows I have gotten. Obviously deep down I know that’s not true but I can’t shake this feeling no matter what I do. I’ve openly shared about it, prayed and whatever else but I still am getting consumed by it.
Thirdly, I am lacking mercy and humbleness. I think because If I have a profound post that people should like it…oh man am I a proud person. I want and need and think about me but social media, just like in real life, isn’t about you. It’s about Jesus. If God has called me to write and get 0 likes and few followers then that is his will and I MUST accept that He is in control. I was reminded this week that it starts with just one person and God oversees the masses. It’s not my job to control or influence everyone or anyone.
So I’m still working on my attitude and feeling comfortable in my own skin. Also speaking of skin I know you all are waiting so patiently to see my year end results and all I can say is soon they will be revealed. 😊
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